One Bedroom Flat
Written By An Indian Engineer
It has been a while since I have been moving around and been away from my dear ones. There are millions of such people out there. Owing to this fact, a few sappy and really weak emails make the rounds on the world wide web describing 'how pathetic our lives are away from our family, friends, society, culture, country'...depends, which version you are reading (We are somewhat to blame for this, since we always crave for sentimental, sensational stuff and plainly ignore the normal, good stuff). So here is my version, One Bedroom Flat, which hopefully will not be touching and kissing, but instead will be something which will help you forget the touchy-feely-clump-in-the-throat sadness.
Here it goes:
THE reality, that's it, reality has no adjectives.
Suresh, a common guy, was the elder brother amongst the brother and sister, to his parents living with their parents in India in their single bedroom flat. A young and resourceful boy, like millions others around him and around the country, he was a recent engineering graduate. His parents were naturally proud of their son who had become an engineer with flying colors.
Of course, Suresh and his parents had their worries over his education put to rest. Suresh was coming out of the academic bubble and entering the fierce arena of job hunt and earning decent wages. Suresh's parents were slowly aging and retirement was only a few years away. Suresh had to find a good job soon, or may be start a business. In either case, get on with money making.
Being a decent engineer, he landed a job in a nearby factory as Engineer Trainee and began working on a shop floor, dealing with the machines and grime. Dirt, sweat, heat and long hours dominated his time at work. But a decent wage and the happiness of applying what he always had been dreaming to do, numbed his troubles.
His parents were happy. He was not unhappy for sure. Life was going smooth. Then one day, one of his friends, Manish, called him up,
Manish: Hi Suresh, Manish here. Listen, what are you doing Friday evening.
Suresh: You know, my job, goes on till late, plus go to go work on Saturday.
Manish: Oh crap! You guys suck! Software industry rocks, we get the weekends (Blow# 1). Anyways, I will postpone my treat to you guys till Saturday evening. But listen, I got a chance to go work 'onsite' for my client. To New York. Can you believe it? (Double whammy)
Suresh: That's awesome dude! Congrats. Your treat better be a splurge. US tour, plus you'll be printing money, in dollars.
Manish: Sure! See you then.
Suresh is happy for his friend. He realizes that one of his best buds will be not just out of the city, but out of country. But this is a temporary assignment. He tells his parents about it. They are happy for his friend. Weeks go by, Suresh continues with his life and then another of his friend flies out.
As time passes by, Suresh makes progress in his career, but nothing too dramatic. Meanwhile, his friends, cousins, distant friends and not-so-much-friends keep on flying out like a flock of birds, as if sensing it is time to move on to better, warmer regions.
Fast forward here: Suresh gets married, has two kids, his sister got married and moved to UK. Parents are aging.
Friends are flying in and flying out of the country in the meantime, as if it was a commuter journey within the city. They are all posting incredibly beautiful pictures of Statue of Liberty, the Golden Gate bridge, Niagara Falls and the stunning natural and man-made landmarks of the western world. Girlfriends, wives, kids are hiking around, merrying at parties, in casinos, at bbqs. Some friend is biking in the woods, other showing off his Audi. Third shooting pictures with his Nikon "Ultra-Cyber-Blast ZX150" camera and so forth. On their frequent trips to India, they bring Suresh, caps and tees of the cities they were living in. Perfumes, body lotions, watches and what not.
On the other hand, Suresh is still in his same job after many years, at a higher post than he originally started out still living in his one bedroom flat, unable to afford a better, slicker one and is continuously fighting off inflation. His parents pass away thinking their son didn't really make much out of his life. He feels he did not achieve much in life. His close ones write him off as being unambitious. Suresh is really sad in his life. He feels he did not fulfill the dreams of his parents of being richer than they were. But now it is too late to change the course. He is burdened by his responsibilities. He is deeply sad and trapped in his own life.
Now, the million dollar question: Was Suresh's life worth at all? He started out in a single bedroom flat and ended up in a single bedroom flat. Most of his friends went on to better lives. He was not able to provide the comforts his friends achieved to his family. He got mired in his job and familial responsibilities. He was unhappy.
This is my alternative story as a response to all the nostalgia-laden, emotional, Swades like stories that try to make us feel bad after many of us achieved their dream of coming to US or elsewhere in the western world. Who would want a life Suresh lived? Any takers here?
The Pursuit of Happyness....
Now, this is something that would have comforted Suresh and would have kept him happy. This is just a perspective on happiness.
1. Suresh never CHOSE to get a job that would have gotten him abroad. This was not going to happen for him. He had to DO something about it.
2. He had a loving wife and really nice kids. He was one of the rare people, who had a perfect and happy family. His wife never gave him a hard time over their fortunes.
3. Suresh was making steady progress in his career. Alas, his life in comparison with his friends, marginalized his hard work in his own eyes.
4. Little did he know, that the gifts his friends got him was all cheap stuff. Bought in bulk at Walmart, Costco and the like, despite being of poor quality and at a cost which Suresh could have afforded even in India, it's perceived value went up ONLY because it was a foreign label.
5. All the amazing snaps on the internet only made him FEEL less happy. In fact, most of his friends, even after living abroad and boasting about it in India, were only marginally happier than him. Because, we consume whatever we get. Once we are satisfied with something, all of us are at the same level of happiness.
The Moral of the Story is: Grass is always greener on the other side. Either you understand that it is a mirage, or BELIEVE that it is for real and move your butt to achieve it. Don't get sappy. Don't compare your life against others lives. There are millions of ways to be unhappy and an awful lot of people will help you stay unhappy by their consumerism and/or ambition. Happiness is just a perception away. ANYWHERE!
Hopefully you made it to the end! :)
